Satirical, Serious, Stories.
What is real, what is not?
We draw the line between the sand, and the baseball field.
We are the demon in your frosted flakes.
Mainstream Media, and the TRUTH are irrelevant,
WE WANT SOMETHING TO READ.
We want to be ENTERTAINED!!!
Want to see this on video?
http://www.STF765.com
Dixie Carter and Stone Cold Steve Austin BURY Vince McMahon on STONE COLD Podcast!
The marks are losing their minds, and the IWC has stopped masturbating long enough, to complain.
Dixie Carter appeared on "The Stone Cold Podcast" to deliver the DEATH BLOW to Vince McMahon and his Fledgling WWE. For years Dixie has DOMINATED the ratings, so much that she has went thru several television deals, because the stations can NOT handle the AD revenue and Attendance records TNA shatters week in and week out.
When asked what the final blow was, she replied.
"Wrestling is fake..."
Once this quote was released WWE stocks TANKED, investors were scrambling to sell, and buy up any investments in TNA. Many have HAILED dixie for using such restraint for so long, but it is TIME for their to only be 1 wrestling company, to produce crappy, predictable, story lines.
Thought it would be cute to disguise a "Terror Attack" by making it look like a "Promposal".
Thanks to the efforts of this man, those efforts were thwarted
and MURICA continues to be the #1 Country on planet earth.
FAT VIDEO GAME NERD
rushed the would be terrorist, put him in what he called "The YES lock"
and made him submit to America's almighty Obesity.
"People told me I was too FAT to be anything. This bothered me for years. So, I was standing around a random Highschool, hitting on underage girls, and I see this Middle Eastern guy walk in with a BOMB on his chest. So I did what my favorite wrestler "Daniel Bryan" would do. MAKE HIM TAP!"
This is FAT GUYS favorite wrestler, "Daniel Bryan".
Take today to hug an OBESE Video game nerd.
He MAY save your life.
(This story and any other bullshit on this blog is FAKE and MADE UP. STOP believing everything on the internet. Slapnuts.)
As we all know, Jared Leto cut his LOCKS OF LOVE, his JESUS JOB, his fucking hair! TO become the joker, in THE SUICIDE SQUAD. I thought this was a movie about Kurt Cobain and Robin Williams, but I was wrong.
Leto posted a picture on SNAPCHAT
(Whose 10 second viewing concept has been negated by pic stealing programs.)
JARED LETO
AS Kim Kardashian
Leto HIT THE MARK when dressing up like MEDIA CLOWN and DOUCHE BAG banger, Kim Kardashian, When asked in an interview, how it felt to play the MOST TALENTED and IMPORTANT alive, he simply replied,
"Religious Experience."
No further words were heard from LETO, and he started rocking a baby doll, pinching his genitals with salad tongs, and skipping through a trash filled alley. People claim he is "Looking for inspiration" to be Kim even better than she can be Kim.
You know, pretending to be a parent, putting anything on your crotch to feel good, and walking amongst trash that thinks it is food.
BTW this is what LETO looked like before his transformation into a Kardashian.
YES Jared Leto IS Jesus of Nazareth, the band, HAIR OF THE DOG!
This is a typical tale of some "Joe Schmo" who just happens to get through life by breathing. Try as he will, nothing ever seems to go in his favor. On a typical night, good ole "Joe" does the same thing he does every night. Eat 3 frozen pizzas, and cry himself to sleep over the cover of a Hustler magazine. The next morning he wakes up, half ass brushes his teeth, finds the least smelly shirt on the floor, and leaves for work. As Joe is walking down the street he notices women are saying "Hi" and "Hello Meat Stick" and other out of the ordinary things. You see, Joe is NOT popular with the ladies, NOT ONE BIT! SO this takes him by surprise, and anxiety starts to kick in. At one point, the "Prom Queen" walked up and grabbed ole Joe's meat stick, and punched herself in the eye. "What in the hell is going on...?" Joe continues on his journey to work.
After a few minutes Joe has forgotten all about the incident where 10 women wanted his garbage. He arrives at his job, at the local convenient store (you know the kind with bullet proof glass).
After a rather uneventful shift, Joe goes to take the garbage out. YES, trash, not his MEAT STICK. Although, he may have done that earlier, but we aren't here to discuss his libido, we already know he is sexually WE TAR DID. Near the dumpster he spots something about the size of a Basketball. "It's a fucking egg man!" Joe shouts "...and it's fucking huge." Not sure why Joe is shouting, maybe in hopes that someone will STEAL it, relieving him of any responsibility.
Joe takes this big fucking egg home, keeps it warm in a nest of old ass news papers, empty boxes of beer, and by lounging and getting stoned on it. One day while burning a fat joint, the egg began to rumble. "Holy shit, what is coming out of this thing?" Joe said turning towards the egg The egg burst open, and it's a baby fucking bear!
"Wow, a fucking BEAR in a basketball sized egg!" Joe picks the bear up. "I will call you, Alfonzo the bear. Yea, that's a great name!" Joe raised this wild Bear/ Bird for 20 years. One day, Joe came home from work, and was viciously attacked by Alfonzo. Alfonzo ripped Joe's heart out, and there was no reason to be known for the attack. Because bears can't fucking talk.
Casey Anthony is best know for smoking cigars, and putting bottles into her body cavities. At one time, she did murder her daughter, and somehow, got away with it. In a land where CHILD MOLESTORS get probation and Drug Dealers get life, in America, you can get away with murder. So long as your case is so hyped up in the media that the crime takes a back seat to any actual justice. Two men from the Midwest, who were MADLY infatuated with Casey Anthony. (One allegedly has a cigar butt that Casey used as a sex toy. GROSS) Decided to start a "Fan Club" for those in love with Casey. "There are no FAN CLUBS for evil people in the world. She may be a murderer, but I will HIT THAT in a heart beat. Genital Warts and all." Explained one founder "I don't think she murdered her child at all. My kids are all the time tying one another up and playing the storm drain game." Upon talking to the Gentlemen, they gave us a copy of their newest commercial for their fan club. You can view it below in FULL HD and mediocre GREEN SCREEN!
As shocking as this, there seem to be MORE and MORE fan clubs popping up for the "Infamous" Americans and their crimes.
"Once the American media ruins them, they need to live. This allows them to make some money, buy cigars Champagne, a house... Maybe a car.
We just want to give back to those that have already taken so much."
They ask that you watch the above video before joining the Fan Club.
It may not be for everyone.
Below are some of the other "INFAMOUS FAN CLUBS" that exist as well.
Executed for defending herself against horny assholes.
Guilty of trying to chop fire wood, missing, and hitting her entire family.
Guilty of parking on a boat ramp and having bad brakes.
As you can see, not ALL of these women are guilty.
Women are persecuted 125% more than men because they have a vagina.
This is the actual wording in docket # 34.987 in Franklin vs Jackson 1923.
Support Women Murderers, they are people too!
(This entire article, site, and most likely my name too, is all SATIRE. You were told, now stop pretending you didn't know.)
